Parents, Dating, and You

       Have you ever had the crush of your dreams ask you out? Pretty exciting right? Then comes that awful, rock-in-your-stomach moment where you have to ask your parents to go out. Sometimes it seems like they just don't get it, you're not their little girl anymore. You're growing up and they're holding you back. I know it seems like they are being mean or unfair, but they're not. They are just scared.

       They are scared to send you out into that big open world by yourself, and dating is one of the major events where this happens. They are afraid some young boy or girl will come and tear your heart to pieces. You are their little girl. Who wants to see that happen? Who wants to see their child torn down by someone else? To parents, no one could ever be good enough for their child. The only thing a boy/girl friend is good for is hurting you. They are just as scared of you dating as you are of talking to them about it.

       Being upfront and striaght forward about it is the best approach to getting permission to date. Sit down with your parents and just talk to them about it. Explain that you're getting older now and you request their permission to date. Keep a calm level head about the situation even if their responses frutrate you. If they denied your request simpy ask them why. Listen to your parents concerns, they might surprise you.

       Negotiate. Dating is an important social behavior in the develoment of teens. If they are wary about sending you off with a partner on your own then negotiate with them. Tell them why dating is important to you as an individual.  If they are concerned about your grades, strike up a deal. If your grades, chores, or whatever they arre concerned about slips in even the slightest way they have the authority to keep you from dating. Let them know they raised a fine young lady and they should have trust in their parenting skills.  Having trust in you means having trust intheir skills as a parent. So the net time you want to inform your parents about a date or new guy, just remember they're as afraid as you are and it only takes a simple talk to work everything out.